


when am i gonna lose you?

by sunnytoro



Category: Danger Days: The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys (Album), The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys (Comic)
Genre: "when am i gonna lose you" by local natives, Day At The Beach, Inspired by Music, Nonbinary Fun Ghoul, Nonbinary Kobra Kid, Other, Pining, that songs a Bop btw go listen to it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-24
Updated: 2019-09-08
Packaged: 2020-07-19 02:41:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,205
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19966696
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunnytoro/pseuds/sunnytoro
Summary: The Fabulous Four decide, on a whim, to search for the Pacific Ocean.





	1. Trace the Curving of the Coastline

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> no trigger warnings, but if u think i need to tag any please don't hesitate to tell me so!!

Imagine the perfect summer day. The sky is almost cloudless, and a gentle breeze blows across the desert sand. The Fabulous Killjoys and The Girl leave the diner on a day just like this with one objective in mind: they’re going to try to find the ocean.

“Does everyone have all their shit?” Poison asks the rest of the group. “Food n’ water n’ everything?”

“Yeah, n’ I have the sun lotion,” Ghoul says. They hold a beat-up, half-filled, Better Living-Approved bottle of lotion that the Four mostly use on long trips out in the zones, since it’s so hard to come by.

Kobra can barely hold back eir excitement. Ey’ve always thought it would be fun to see the ocean; ey’ve only seen it in old pictures before today. Kobra might be more excited for Jet, though. Since he was very young, it’s apparently been his dream to see the ocean. He gets into the car with a huge grin on his face, and Kobra is filled with a longing feeling. Ey could gaze at that smile for the rest of eir life.

Once everyone else is in, Poison drives west, in the direction of the sea.

“I don’t know if you all ‘re aware, but we’re gonna to have to leave the zones to get to the Pacific,” Poison addresses. Kobra feels that familiar nervous ache in eir stomach.

Eir jaw drops and ey stare at eir brother.

“Wait, WHAT? What about the—” ey begin to panic.

“Oh my _god,_ Kobra, there’s no radiation,” Ghoul groans, interrupting em. “It’s all stupid Better Living propaganda, tryin’ to scare people into Bat City. We’re all gonna be fine.”

“A-are ya _completely_ sure?” Kobra says urgently.

“Yes, and also you’re scaring The Girl,” Poison sighs. “Calm down, dude. Your nerves ‘re infectious, y’know.” He pauses, then glances into the rear-view mirror. “Jet, you look excited.” Kobra’s heart jumps in eir chest at the thought of Jet’s smiling face.

“I mean, I dunno...” Jet says sheepishly.

“Don’t even try that ‘I dunno’ bull _shit!”_ Ghoul exclaims. “I still remember the look ya would have on your face when your _abuela_ would tell ya stories about the Pacific when we were, like, four. Like—” Kobra turns around in eir chair to see Ghoul making a face as if they were seeing Destroya itself standing right front of them. The Girl, right now just a toddler, giggles with her hand in her mouth. Poison even chuckles. On the other hand, Jet rolls his eyes, but even he still laughs a little bit.

“Fine. _Maybe_ I’ve dropped a few hints that I kinda like the ocean,” he says, amusement in his voice.

“ _A few? Kinda?_ Jet, don’t even test me,” Ghoul says, clearly exasperated. Kobra decides to tune out the pair in the backseat as they begin to playfully argue.

“Poison, where are we?” Kobra asks eir brother, whose eyes somehow haven’t come off of the road.

“Oh, uh...” He looks at the scratched-up GPS built into the car. “I think we’re about to reach the end of Zone 6.” Kobra tenses up as Poison speeds down the road even faster.

“We’re not gonna get radiation sickness, Kobra, I swear,” Ghoul says, looking around at what little remains of Zone 7. “Just a little longer and we’ll probably see the beach.”

A few minutes pass as everyone in the car looks around frantically for the endless stretch of blue. They leave a valley and suddenly Jet gasps loud enough to make everyone in the car jump. The Pacific Ocean is _right there,_ outside his window, rushing by as Poison drives on the road parallel to it. He presses his hands to the window like a little kid, and Kobra can’t help but get flooded with affection.

“Oh my god. Oh my god, I think we found it,” Poison says gleefully. He slowly turns onto a path leading to the beach and parks the car on the sand. No one makes any move to get out at first. They’re mostly astounded at the fact that, holy shit, they just did the seemingly impossible and found the fucking ocean.

“We should go out and look,” Ghoul says in a hushed voice after some time. “Who _knows_ if we’ll ever come back here?”

“Yeah. We should go look!” Poison replies. Jet only nods. He looks like he’s going to cry, he’s so happy. Ghoul and Poison practically jump out of the car, kick off their boots, and run towards the waves with The Girl, but Jet and Kobra stay behind. Ey can’t help but smile back at Jet.

“How’re you feeling?” ey ask, eir voice soft and gentle.

“I...I feel so fuckin’ happy. Like, there it is!” Jet points to the water and laughs to himself. “My childhood dream is right there! I wish _mi abuela_ was here to see it...can we...can we walk to the water?” Kobra feels like ey’re about to explode with nervousness, and love for eir crush. Ey can’t help but fantasize that Jet just asked em on a date.

“O-of course we can! Let’s take off our boots first, though,” Kobra says. They both leave their boots in the car, and Kobra gets out first. The sand feels cooler on eir feet than back in the Zones, which is a relief. Ey walk over to Jet’s side of the car and open the door for him. Jet takes Kobra’s hand and stands up, and Kobra's breath catches since Jet’s _holding eir fucking hand._

“Jeez, my legs feel like they’re about to give out,” he says. “I think I’m just excited. ‘N overwhelmed, maybe, but in a good way.” He and Kobra stand there by the Trans Am, taking in the scene before them. The water is a shade of dark blue, speckled with bits of white foam from the calm surf. The sand is white and smooth from years of not being used. Every now and then, a withered beach umbrella or lounge chair from times long gone can be seen in the overgrown dunes.

 _“Wow,”_ Jet whispers. “It’s better than anything my imagination could’ve made up. Way better.”

“Should we go?” Kobra asks, beginning to walk towards the ocean. Jet follows em, and they walk side-by-side down to the water. Kobra notices Poison’s and Ghoul’s jackets have been thrown into the sand, and sees the two of them running, laughing and shouting down the beach, throwing sand and kicking water at each other.

“Hold on a second,” Jet says, and he leaves Kobra’s side to grab The Girl, who's trying to run around near them. He returns, holding her on his side with one arm. “Look, I don’t blame the two of them for getting distracted, but I don’t want _her_ getting caught in all _that.”_

“That’s valid,” Kobra replies. Ey suddenly hear someone yell and then a loud splash, and ey and Jet turn towards the source. Poison and Ghoul are in the water, a shallow part it looks like. Poison’s tackling Ghoul, and they're both wet, covered in sand, and laughing their asses off.

Jet, Kobra, and The Girl reach the water, which they discover is lukewarm to the touch. It is, after all, the middle of summer in California. Jet sets The Girl down and he and Kobra hold her small hands as she clumsily walks towards the ocean. She’s already good at walking on her own, but here she’s probably going to need help. Her feet get wet and she smiles wide.

“It feels nice, doesn’t it?” Jet asks her. He has a smile on his face, too. A little wave rolls towards them, maybe half a foot tall, and Jet and Kobra lift The Girl over it and set her down on her feet, and she laughs. They do this a few more times as gentle waves come their way, and Kobra has to smile. Ey really hope ey can come back here someday.

The three of them sit in the sand after The Girl gets tired of playing in the water. She builds little hills made of sand that she calls her “sandcastles” while Jet and Kobra watch Poison unsuccessfully teach Ghoul how to swim.

“Can you swim?” Kobra asks Jet as ey sprinkle some sand on top of The Girl’s latest sandcastle.

“Oh, no. But I wish I could,” Jet wistfully says, “‘Cuz it’s fuckin’ hot out here.” Kobra looks over at him. He’s watching the horizon with a content little smile on his face.

“Can you?” Jet asks, still looking out at the endless sea.

“Um, yeah...” Kobra mumbles, distracted now by the dark freckles blooming on Jet’s cheeks. _They weren’t there before,_ ey think. His face is also beginning to get burned from the sun, and Kobra touches eir own face delicately to find that it stings.

“Hey, I’m gonna grab the sun lotion. I think we’re getting burned,” Kobra says, getting up and dusting emself off.

“‘Kay, I’ll watch The Girl. Honey, can I help with your castle?” Jet replies, turning to her and scooping up a handful of sand. Kobra, meanwhile, speed-walks towards the Trans Am.

If Kobra’s being honest, ey didn’t want to get away from everyone just to find the sun lotion. Ey can’t help the fact that Jet makes em flustered to high hell, with his freckles and his cute smile and his enthusiasm about the sea. Ey need to be alone with eir thoughts before they all explode out of em, and ey say something ey might regret.

Kobra opens one of the rear doors of the Trans Am, but ey stop in eir tracks. Every cell in Kobra’s body is yelling at em to confess to Jet that ey love him, but ey just can’t yet. Ey have _too many questions._ Does Jet even like em in that way? What if telling Jet destroys their friendship? What if Jet secretly hates em? Like, _right now?_

“Um, Kobra!” someone shouts. Kobra looks over his shoulder to see Jet walking towards em, holding The Girl’s hand. “Is everything okay? You’ve just been...standin’ there, at the door.”

Kobra straightens up. “O-oh! I’m fine, just...just lost in thought.” Jet smiles at em, but Kobra can sense worry on his face. Ey can feel eir whole body tingle with anticipation as ey consider telling Jet the truth. But ey’re cut off too quickly to actually say anything.

“...I mean, if you say so. I see the sun lotion, anyway, I’ll get it for ya,” Jet says, leaning into the car and grabbing the bottle off of the floor. They all walk back to their little spot in the sand, and when Jet calls Poison and Ghoul out of the water before they burn more than they already have, Kobra still feels awfully shaken up. Ey’re not sure if it’s anxiety that ey’re feeling, or... _something else._

But what ey know for sure is that ey have to tell Jet the truth at some point...but when, and how?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i looked and its been like a month since my last oneshot.. executive dysfunction is a bitch sometimes  
> i've wanted to write something where the four go to the beach for a while now, since i love the beach and go there all the time :p not many people go to the pacific in my canon, since so many joys are convinced there's radiation, or maybe they don't have a vehicle that's fast enough, or enough food, or maybe they just don't know where to fuckin go. and yeah, there have definitely been deaths on the way there, so that's another factor.  
> im also gonna have this be like a 2-3 part story look out for those next part(s), whenever they might come out ;)


	2. I Knew That I Wanted You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kobra Kid makes an important announcement.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> can't really think of any triggers for this chapter either, but once again, if you want me to put anything here, just say so and i will :)

Kobra Kid’s seen plenty of sunsets since ey’ve escaped to the zones. The colors the sky would turn have always captivated em. But nothing, and ey mean nothing could top what ey’re seeing right now.

Ey and all the others had been sitting in the sand together, eating individual cans of Power Pup and sharing one can of fruit. They were all facing away from the ocean so the sun wouldn’t get in their eyes, but by this time it was beginning to get dark.

Poison stood up in the middle of a conversation the Four were having about some weird dude they saw at Tommy Chow Mein’s store. “Hey, guys, I’m gonna grab the canteen, I’ll be right back—OH, WOW!” he exclaimed. Everyone turned to see what Poison was looking at. He was pointing at the ocean, at the sunset Kobra’s looking at right now.

The sky is colored shades ranging from vibrant orange to deep red, and the ocean matches it. The sun looks like a drop of liquid gold. Everything’s lit with a warm, orange light. As Kobra, Jet, Ghoul, and The Girl all turn around where they’re sitting to watch the scene unfold before them, Kobra silently wishes ey had a camera; this is something ey never want to forget.

“Shit…that’s the prettiest fuckin’ thing I’ve ever seen!” Ghoul says enthusiastically as Poison runs off.

“It really is…” Kobra replies. Ey’re basically speechless at this point.

“Jet? What do ya—oh. That’s understandable,” Ghoul says. Kobra turns to eir left to find Jet, his jaw dropping in astonishment.

“It’s better than the pictures,” he gasps. “Kobra, are you seeing this?”

“Y-yeah,” ey sputter.

Poison runs back to the others with the canteen he promised to get and crashes into the sand next to Kobra, who flinches as sand sprays everywhere. Jet instinctively pulls em closer to him, laughing all the while. Blushing, Kobra brushes sand off of eir arm.

**…**

They all drove home once the sun had gone completely down. The drive felt long, and oddly sad, because that trip to the ocean had felt like a break from the difficulties and darkness of life in the zones. The beach was like a whole new world.

Kobra’s in eir room now, getting ready to go to bed. Ey set eir ray gun on a pile of magazines near eir bed, sit down, and take eir boots off. Kobra can hear Jet in the next room saying goodnight to The Girl. Ey listen to Jet tell her some fairytale he made up and smile to emself; ey’ve always admired how good he is with kids. The door to The Girl’s room closes quietly, and Kobra watches Jet walk by eir room on tip-toes. Ey can’t help but chuckle softly, which gets Jet’s attention.

“Don’t laugh at me, Kobra,” Jet says, but he’s laughing, too. “How’re ya doing?”

“Oh, I’m fine. That trip to the beach really was somethin’, huh?” Kobra says.

“Yeah...yeah, it was.” Jet sat down on the floor next to Kobra as ey took off eir jacket. “We _have_ to go back someday. We can’t just...not do that again, y’know?”

“I agree. Maybe we can convince Poison tomorrow morning,” Kobra answers. Jet smiles and chuckles again.

“I hope so.” A stretch of silence. And then Jet confides, “I had fun with you today.”

Kobra’s mind goes blank for a second, but then ey smile and gather eir thoughts. “Me too. It was nice to get away from,” –ey gesture vaguely around emself— “all of this for a while. And I even got to be with you and The Girl! W-which is extra nice.” Jet smiles too, and looks at his boots. _Wait a minute—is he blushing? Or am I seeing things?_

“Hey, I’m…I’m glad you think that, Kobra. I think I’m gonna go to bed now, okay? I’m tired,” Jet sighs. He stands up and walks to the doorway, but he turns around and smiles at the last moment Kobra can see him.

“‘Night.”

And Kobra’s left there on the floor with the sleeves of eir jacket around eir wrists. Ey let out a heavy sigh. _Why does he have to be so confusing?_

Ey stand up, shake off eir jacket, and pull a cord to turn off the light on eir ceiling. Clumily, ey fall onto their bed, not even taking eir jeans off.

“Oh god…I should tell him now, should I?” Kobra moans into eir pillow.

Ey fall asleep quick enough after panicking for a bit. But now that it’s the next morning, Kobra’s panicking again. This is it. This is the day.

The day Kobra’s finally going to formally come out.

Why are ey so nervous, though? It’s not like eir sibling and friends are going to _reject_ em. None of them are even cishet, for Destroya’s sake. Ey shouldn’t be making this into a big deal. Ey just need to get up, go out there, and _do it..._ now if only that was easier said than done.

Kobra decides not to change eir clothes; ey leave eir room in what ey wore yesterday. When ey enter the diner, ey stumble and stand by the door, fidgeting. Obviously, eir roommates, who are all currently sitting around eating breakfast, notice this.

“Nice to see you up, Kobra,” Jet says, glancing up at em quickly before averting his attention back to the girl.

“Yeah, ya want anything from in here?” asks Poison, who’s in the kitchen.

A shaky “uh…” is all Kobra can say. Everyone has their full attention on em now. Poison leans over the counter separating him from the rest of the dilapidated seating area.

“Are you okay, dude?” he questions Kobra. “Ya look like you have somethin’ on your mind.”

“Yeah, just say it, we won’t make fun of ya or anything. Probably,” Ghoul says.

“I just…wanted to tell you that I’m…um…” Kobra stutters. Poison clears the counter and stands in front of Kobra, his hands on eir shoulders.

“Kobra, just say it. Say what ya gotta say,” he urges. Kobra says nothing; ey’re clamming up, but Poison isn’t taking no for an answer.

“Kobra, come on, you can do it. _Spit it out!”_

“I’M BI, OKAY?!” ey shout. Poison stumbles back, and everything is still. “I’m bi…bisexual. _That’s_ what I wanted to say.” Eir hands are trembling. Eir heart is racing. But at least ey said it.

Ghoul looks confused, and… _underwhelmed?_ “That’s it?” they ask. “ _That’s_ your deep, dark secret? I thought you were gonna say you were, like…gonna die in three days, or something.”

“Well…yeah. I guess that’s everything,” Kobra shrugs. Ghoul considers their words before speaking.

“Okay…don’t take this the wrong way, Kobra, but…I sorta figured you weren’t straight. I’ve seen the way you look at Jet.” Kobra freezes, and silently hopes for Ghoul to shut the fuck up.

Poison cuts in. “Me too. You get _major_ heart-eyes, we’ve all seen it.”

 _OH MY GOD._ They _know._ No one speaks. Jet has a look on his face that Kobra can’t interpret, because ey can’t physically _look_ at him without feeling hot with embarrassment.

“Wait, Kobra, you _like_ me?” Jet asks Kobra, who finally looks over at him for longer than half a second. His cheeks are tinged pink, and he has a small smile on his face. “I...I didn’t know.”

Meanwhile, Ghoul and Poison look at each other incredulously, then back at Jet.

“Hold on. Go back. You didn’t— _what?”_ Ghoul asks Jet.

“Jet-fucking-Star. You _can’t_ seriously say that you didn’t know Kobra has a thing for you,” Poison says.

“I didn’t know!” Jet exclaims. “How was I supposed to know that ey liked me back?”

“Wait, you _like me?!”_ Kobra questions with an air of disbelief. Ghoul and Poison, on the other hand, look visibly frustrated.

“You both are so fucking oblivious—I’m done,” Poison says, and walks, hands up in defeat, back to the kitchen. Ghoul starts to laugh. Kobra still remains in eir place by the door, feeling nauseous from anxiety. Ey were planning to come out and then _privately_ confess to Jet, but it seems ey doesn’t need to anymore. Because everyone already fucking _knew._

Ey can’t take it anymore. Without another word, Kobra slips back into eir room, hoping no one notices. Ey shakily sit on eir bed again and tightly hug eir torso, hoping for any relief.

At that moment, Jet appears in eir doorway.

“Hey, are you alright?” he asks. His voice is gentle.

“I’ve been better,” Kobra sulks. Jet takes a few tentative steps towards em.

“Is it okay if I sit with you?” Jet asks. Appreciating Jet’s cautiousness, Kobra answers, “Please.”

Jet takes a seat on the bed next to Kobra. Neither of them say, or even do, much of anything. They simply enjoy each other’s presence.

“I don’t think that went the way you wanted it to, huh, Kobra?” Jet finally asks.

“Not...really? I mean, I did want to come out in front of everyone, but I wanted to, uh...confess to you...in private,” Kobra says.

“Yeah…I’ll talk to them about that if it’ll make ya feel better,” Jet offers. Kobra nods eir head, and Jet moves closer to em. Ey involuntarily tense up.

“Hey, Kobra, are you sure you’re okay?” Jet sounds concerned when he asks this question.

“I...Jet, do you really like me?” Kobra asks, clenching eir fists. Ey can’t look him in the eye again.

Without hesitation, he says, “Yes. Absolutely. You’re like, my favorite person. Well, other than The Girl, but she’s in a different category.”

“Of course. Because she’s your family. Your actual family.”

“...Kobra, I know what you mean, but...you’re all my “actual” family. However,...oh, how do I say this? You’re...more than that. More than a roommate, or a friend, even. _I like you,_ Kobra. I don’t know how to make you believe it, but I do. I’d even go as far as to say I l-love you. You’re...you’re like no other person I’ve ever met; I’ve never felt this way about anyone, really, other than you. Like, sure, I’ve found people attractive before, but Kobra, this is...different.” Jet pauses, and his lips tighten. “Sorry. I’ve thought about this, a-and what I should say, for a while. I should shut up now.” With one look at Jet, Kobra can tell that he’s...apprehensive, because now _he’s_ the one that can’t look at _Kobra._

“Don’t worry about it,” ey murmur. Kobra can physically feel eir anxiety melting away. “And don’t apologize. Destroya knows I already do that enough. And anyway, I...have some things I want to tell you, too…from the time I met you, it only took a few weeks, maybe even a few days, I don’t exactly remember, for me to realize that I felt...something else about you. Like, something that wasn’t platonic. Because, I don’t know...you’re just so...” Kobra tries to find a word for what ey think of Jet, who’s smiling again, listening to Kobra speak eir mind.

“You’re so...great. And kind. And fearless, and ya don’t take shit from anyone. You’re everything I wish _I_ was, Jet.”

Jet reaches for Kobra’s hand, and ey take it. “But if I’m fearless, then do ya know what you are, that I’m not?” Kobra shakes eir head.

“You’re courageous.”

“How?”

“Well...ya may get nervous often, and sure, maybe the things people say about you get to ya sometimes. But, Kobra, in spite of all of that...you keep goin’. And I think that’s so much braver than having no fears at all. You _are_ scared sometimes, but you try your fuckin’ hardest not to let that stop ya.” Kobra leans on Jet’s shoulder, and he pulls em closer to him. The two of them hold each other. “I love watching you overcome your fears. In those moments, I feel so proud of you. So, _so_ fucking proud.”

“Jet...that was far more poetic than anything I could ever say to you,” Kobra sighs.

“No, Kobra, don’t even worry about that!” Jet kisses the top of Kobra’s head, and ey nestle ever closer to him. “What you said was perfect. And besides, what you said doesn’t even matter in the first place, because I love you for _you,_ not how great you can confess your love for me.”

Kobra chuckles. “I guess you’re right.” Ey reposition emself on the bed so ey sit with eir legs under em, facing Jet. Ey look up at him. The sun’s coming through the window behind him, surrounding him with a yellow glow.

Jet smiles; his teeth even show a little bit. “Poison really _was_ right about the heart-eyes thing,” he says. And then Kobra kisses him.

Ey _wanted_ to kiss Jet’s lips, but ey fall a little short and kiss him a little above his jawline. Eir whole body is filled with a fluttery, almost tingly feeling. Because this is Kobra’s first kiss. Not just with Jet Star, but _ever._ What if ey messed up? Ey pull away.

“Wait, why’d ya stop?” Jet asks.

“I-I thought I was doing it wrong!” Kobra says, eir voice shrill.

Jet shrugs. “Then let’s do it right.”

Kobra kisses him again, this time on target. Both of eir hands hold the sides of Jet’s face, and Jet’s hands are positioned on Kobra’s back, keeping em close to him with a gentle hold. Kobra notices how tensed up eir face is, so ey relax it. The corners of Jet’s puckered lips turn up in a smile, and the two lovers pull away, looking into each other’s eyes.

“Was that better?” Jet whispers. Kobra feels emself blush and lies eir head on Jet’s shoulder.

“Yeah,” Kobra mumbles into Jet’s t-shirt. “Can we stay in here all day? I’d like to just hold you for a...a little bit.”

Both of them lay down on Kobra’s sunlit bed, still hugging each other. “You can say forever, Kobra. I have a feeling that that was what you meant.”

“Right again, Jet. That’s _absolutely_ what I meant.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sry for posting this so late i had no actual idea what to write here hehe  
> this is pretty much how i think jet and kobra got together i guess? idk man i wanted to write something cheesy and sugary sweet cuz I Am Into That.  
> i dont think ive ever done this on here so lets promote my tumblrs! eyy my main is laughterlove (general mcr content and things that make me laugh) and my danger days blog is thehappycamperz (headcanons and art of various killjoys, including my own original ones)


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